Let me first offer a caveat here: I am no scholar, no theologian and no pastor or priest. I’m simply a follower of Christ compelled to talk about prayer online. So, I’m no ‘expert’. I am, however, a man who prays and seeks to follow Christ. God invites all to know Him and be known…no one has a corner on this market. This is why I encourage any readers to share their comments and their experiences…I want to know how God is speaking to you. This journey is best experienced as a shared journey.
For those who have struggled to develop a prayer life, and for whom the idea of contemplative prayer strikes a chord, let me suggest a starting point. It’s important to consider that prayer is not a one-way conversation, even though it may feel like it. If God is who we believe Him to be, then it stands to reason that He is capable of speaking into our lives. Yet, many of us have trouble with this. We hear folks in church say God is speaking to them, while our prayers seem to disappear into the air above us…the silence from heaven, deafening. Take comfort in the fact that God comes to each of us in His own way, in a way that meets us exactly where we are…and He does it on His terms. The testimony of others is what it is…they may be hearing from God, or they may not be. It doesn’t need to be a concern. Learn to allow silence in your prayer, for God to speak or not speak…and He may choose to not speak, and that’s just fine. He is God, after all. We can rest in His presence quietly, sitting with Him in reverence, in silence, as two who are known well enough that words are not necessary.
I believe a rich prayer life requires some discipline…which hasn’t come naturally for me. We are in relationship with God through prayer, so to enjoy and deepen this relationship, time set aside for prayer is important. I’ve aimed at setting aside an hour every day for prayer and contemplation. Important: This shouldn’t start a shame cycle, where prayer becomes a “have to” instead of a “want to”. This is not about doing something to find or please God, it’s about what God has already done, inviting us into relationship with Him. Just pray. If you don’t want to, then don’t pray. The time has passed, but you haven’t hurt or angered God. He is always facing toward us…even when we turn away.
Develop your own “practice”, bringing things into prayer that work for you. Find a particular place in your home to be alone. I love early mornings, a comfortable chair, candles lit, a bible and other reading materials ready. There’s a familiar atmosphere of tranquility, and I know the time is dedicated to God.
Centering Prayer is a great way to slow down and prepare your mind and heart to listen. The Examen, a daily prayer of mindfulness suggested by St. Ignatius in his Exercises, is useful. Scripture can be contemplated or prayed through (this is not a time for bible study, but ‘bible prayer‘.) One might become compelled to pray for someone, or to rest in a particular grace encountered in scripture or another reading material. The Lord’s Prayer is a wonderful way to close a prayer period, slowly praying through it in your own words, going where it leads you. I highly recommend journaling as well. Some people write prayers out, describe insights that come out of prayer, or just keep an account of the thoughts and activities of daily life with Christ.
There are many ways to pray, and many books describing what others have found meaningful. Find your own routine, take what works, leave what doesn’t. Find a good spiritual director, mentor or join a prayer group at church…phone a friend…this journey is lived best as a shared journey.
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